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Title: blonde joke Post by: bubba on July 20, 2007, 10:36:52 am A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire
herself Out as a "handywoman" and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if He had any odd jobs for her to do. "Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch," he said, "How much will you charge me?" The blonde quickly responded, "How about $50?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need was in the garage. The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?" He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?" The wife replied, "You're right I guess I'm starting to believe all those 'dumb blonde' jokes we've been getting by e-mail lately." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. "You're finished already?" the husband asked. "Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint leftover, so I gave it Two coats." Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it to her. "And by the way," the blonde added, "it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus". Title: blonde joke Post by: BryanH on July 20, 2007, 02:19:42 pm Here's her sister's car.
Title: Re: blonde joke Post by: MICA on October 17, 2007, 07:53:20 pm three blondes walk into a building ...... you think one of them would have seen it?
Title: Re: blonde joke Post by: MoonDawg on October 18, 2007, 10:15:56 am :biggrin: Welcome Mica :biggrin: LOL
Title: Re: blonde joke Post by: Gumbo on October 18, 2007, 09:09:37 pm Hey! Hey! My wife is a blonde :biggrin:
Title: Re: blonde joke Post by: collecture on October 18, 2007, 10:56:10 pm Not really a blond joke, but...
After a long night of making love, the guy notices a photo of another man on the woman's nightstand by the bed. He begins to worry. "Is this your husband?" he nervously asks. "No, silly," she replies, snuggling up to him. "Your boyfriend, then?" he continues. "No, not at all," she says, nibbling away at his ear. "Is it your dad or your brother?" he inquires, hoping to be reassured. "No, no, no! You are so hot when you're jealous!" she answers. "Well, who in the hell is he, then?" he demands. She whispers in his ear "That's me before the surgery." Title: Re: blonde joke Post by: collecture on October 18, 2007, 10:57:30 pm And another:
Why can boys run faster than girls? Ball bearings and a gear shift! Title: Re: blonde joke Post by: kstt on October 19, 2007, 08:31:14 am Oldie but a goodie:
Two blondes are walking on the beach. One looks down a discovers a compact. She picks it up and opens it. "Oh my God!" she exclaims. "I' recognize that person," she yells as she sees herself in the mirror. Her companion snaps the compact away from her and examines it. "That's ME, you idiot!!" Title: Re: blonde joke Post by: Creighton on October 19, 2007, 05:58:33 pm There's a blonde driving down the freeway, and she's listening to a radio station where the DJ is talking about blonde jokes.The blonde is getting furious, and she sees this other blonde trying to row a boat across a grass field.
So she pulls her car over and starts walking towards the blonde in the boat, stopping just before she gets to the field. She then starts yelling "It's blondes like you that make everyone think I am stupid. If I could swim I would come over there and give you a piece of my mind". Title: Re: blonde joke Post by: MoonDawg on October 19, 2007, 09:31:27 pm A blonde get's on a flight from L.A. to Dallas. Shortly after takeoff she sees an empty seat in the first class section so she gets up and moves into it!
Stewardess says she can't do this but the blonde says "I'll move but only if somebody comes back to claim this seat". After all 4 flight attendants couldn't persuade her to return to her own seat the incident had to be reported to the pilot. In the cockpit, however the problem was overheard by the co-pilot who said "Hey....my wife is blonde, let me handle this" After no objections, the young co-pilot got up,walked back and sat right next to this beautiful woman. He whispered something in her ear and then got up and went back to fly his plane. The blonde got up and immediately went back to her assigned seat! The crew was all amazed............"what did you say to her" they asked? " I told her that first class doesn't stop in Dallas " :biggrin: Title: Re: blonde joke Post by: Pat Pixley on October 21, 2007, 11:38:13 pm Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A. Pull the pin and throw it back. Q. What do you call a blonde in the closet? A. The 1984 hide and go seek champion. Q. How can you tell a blonde has used your computer? A. There is white out on the screen. And Blonde Inventions 1. The water-proof towel 2. Solar powered flashlight 3. Submarine screen door 4. A book on how to read 5. Inflatable dart board 6. A dictionary index 7. Ejector seat in a helicopter 8. Powdered water 9. Pedal-powered wheel chair 10. Water-proof tea bag My daughter is blonde and just loved these. Pat :laugh: Oh and my favorite Q. How will everyone remember Bill Clinton in history? A. The President after Bush :laugh: :laugh: |